


Get Agrekt

by coccinelle_et_chaton



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Drunk AU, F/M, ML, Miraculous Ladybug - Freeform, Writer's Block Therapy, adrien's birthday, coccinelle-et-chaton, get agrekt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-03
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2018-06-06 03:24:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6736111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coccinelle_et_chaton/pseuds/coccinelle_et_chaton
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Adrien's 18th birthday and his first time drinking. Enough said. </p>
<p>Post-reveal. Rated mature because alcohol, sex refs, and a bad case of potty mouth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Drink Club

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I know I should technically be updating AtP but I've been having a bit of a writer's block with it lately, so I decided to write something else. Drunk!Adrien au has been playing in my head for a while now and I decided to give it a shot. It originally was a one-shot (it reads like a one-shot, mind you) but it got so long I decided to cut it up in chapters. I'll be posting the rest in the following days since I'm almost done writing it ^__^
> 
> Enjoy. 
> 
> ALSO DRINK RESPONSIBLY IF YOU GET AGREKT DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE. STAY AT YOUR FRIENDS' HOUSE. YOU GET TO CUDDLE. MAKE SMART LIFE CHOICES. (I feel obligated to pester you since I'm an adult, sorry.)

One of the downsides of being the youngest in your group of friends was that you were the last to be legally allowed to drink, and thus you were left out of the fun. This meant that he couldn't drink in Marinette's birthday in November, nor in Alya's in December, and Nino had to do two birthday parties in May. One with the girls and everybody who could drink at the go-to pub, and another one with the girls and him so he wouldn't be left out.

Now, Adrien never really cared much for alcohol so much as to be left out of the synch. Nino suddenly snorting while Marinette came into the classroom, immediately turning bright red at the sight of him. The three having now "code words" for things they did while drunk that no one, absolutely no one under any circumstances, could ever know. Pictures Marinette wouldn't show him, not even if he begged. They were so secretive about it you'd think they were protecting secret identities.

He would complain about it with Marinette, in the privacy of their night patrols.

"I still don't get why you won't tell me," he said, a tad too irritated. "We're partners. I'm _your boyfriend!_ I thought you trusted me."

"It's not that, chaton," she said with a light laugh. "It's just…" she snorted. "Some of the things I've done… they're just… Not very superhero-like."

His heart dropped. "Ha-did--." He couldn't even word the horrible conclusion he arrived to. "You haven't kissed anyone else, have you?"

Ladybug turned to Chat, half hurt that he'd ever think that and half amused. "Chat, what are you talking about? Of course not! Who do you take me for?" She pecked him on the cheek. 

No, of course she'd never do that because a) her boyfriend was Chat Noir, b) her boyfriend was Adrien Agreste, and c) in her eyes, only he existed. Period. Loyalty aside however, Nino agreed to never tell Adrien about that one time Alya and her got on the table of the pub to dance because the best dancer would get free beer all night. Or the one time this one really drunk guy _dared_ to attempt to steal a kiss from her and Marinette, in her confident drunkenness, knocked the lights off from him. Or that other time when this other guy was hitting on her and being pushy, and Marinette, very angry and drunk, almost picked a fight with him because SHUT UP DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHO MY BOYFRIEND IS? ADRIEN AGRESTE. THAT'S WHO. PISS OFF. Or, the time she dared a stranger to climb the Eiffel tower.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T CLIMB THE TOWER. I AM LADYBUG."

She was so drunk that time her little slip came off as a joke, especially because she tripped as she boasted. For the next week Nino would whisper "Ladybug" every time she stumbled or had a misstep.

Then there was that time Nino and her thought it was a good idea to try and swim in the Seine.

The time Alya and her were convinced they could find Hawkmoth in just one night. On foot. 

"Come on, say something terrible to me so I get akumatized," was Alya's logic.

"Your shirt is fugly," Marinette said.

"But you made it."

"This isn't working…"

If she had to admit it, the only reason why she didn't want to tell Adrien any of this is because she knew him. The kwamis only knew he was picked to be Chat Noir because underneath all that flirting and mischief he was the purest saint. Adrien was always the one to give Marinette a reality check when things got out of hand, and she was sure he'd give her a three-hour lecture about making smart choices if he were to find out about her recklessness.

But on the other hand, if she had to be honest, she'd also have to admit Nino, Alya, and her were making it sound way bigger than it actually was. They didn't cause _that_ much mayhem, and if you compared their drunken adventures to the scandalizing stories Kim always boasted about, it'd be evident they were just teenagers being teenagers. But they had a reason. Ever since June, Nino, Mari, and Alya decided to put together the biggest surprise party they could for Adrien. Part of the game was to make Adrien as frustrated with the topic as they could. They had it all schemed out. Nino would ask Mr. Agreste for permission so that Adrien could "stay over" in his house, as a birthday present. Marinette's parents would be out of town for Adrien's birthday, so her house would take one for the team. Alya would invite everyone and make sure it stayed a secret. They even started a "foundation," which they ironically called the "Let's Get Agreste Agrekt For His Birthday Foundation." They provided donations in the shape of as much money as they could save, or plain old liquor for the party.

Marinette herself pulled some of her connections as Ladybug. Not long ago Chat and her had de-akumatized the owner of a liquor shop who was very grateful with them. And now, she never ever did this, Chat and her had a code of never accepting gifts from akuma victims. But this was Chat's birthday party in question, and she was willing to make a tiny exception. The liquor shop owner was more than happy to provide one keg of German beer and another of Belgian. The finest beer in Paris, according to him.

The hard part was storing it away, though. Nino wouldn't stop asking questions about how she managed to buy two kegs of beer.

"Shit, did you like, steal them?"

"What am I? A thug? Of course not. I saved up for them."

"But this is super expensive."

She shrugged. "I just love my boyfriend very much."

As October arrived, it became harder for the trio to hide their excitement from Adrien. They would heatedly discuss preparations over lunch break, only to abruptly change the subject when Adrien arrived. The poor young man was at a loss. The years of haunting insecurity that trailed behind him didn't help, either. A part of him thought smelling faintly of Camembert was beginning to take its toll on his social life.

"Are you going to break up with me?" he finally said one afternoon after an akuma attack, while Ladybug and him rested on one of Notre Dame's towers. After they revealed their identities and eventually began dating, waiting for their transformations to wear out in the rare occasions they didn't need to summon their powers and spending a few moments together if time allowed it had become part of their routine, so when Ladybug tried to make a run for it, Chat could not help but suspect the worst.

"Are you mad at me? Did I say something bad?"

The evident conflict in Chat's expression wrung Marinette's heart.

"Not at all, chaton." She hugged him and pet his hair. "I just have something really important to do."

Chat Noir squeezed her tightly. "You have been acting weird lately."

"Have I now?"

He nodded.

"Alya and Nino, too."

"I haven't noticed… What I have noticed, however," she said, lifting his chin to see his eyes. "Is that a certain kitten is turning eighteen tomorrow," she said, leaving a trail of soft kisses on the line of his jaw.

He couldn't help but squirm a little. "Yeah…" Feeling mischievous, he took his turn at kissing Ladybug's neck, trying to be as painstakingly slow as he could. She shivered. "Are you getting anything for me, m'lady?"

Marinette gulped, feeling the way he pressed his body against her. He knew that was one way to sidetrack her. "A chastity belt."

Chat Noir snorted, then tentatively licked behind Marinette's ear, prying a moan off from her.

"And a nice bath in holy water," she added with a shivering voice. "Maybe a confession session, but only if you behave- hmph…" She grabbed handfuls of Chat's golden hair as he dived in to kiss her lips, first languidly and with thought, only to increase in abandonment as Marinette started pulling him closer. 

Beep beep! That was their cue to find the stairs, unless they wanted to wait trapped on the roof of Notre Dame with the night chilly as it was until Tikki and Plagg recovered strength. Neither found it in themselves to care in that moment though.

Beep beep!

"My dad's not home," Adrien breathlessly said as he broke the kiss.

"Sorry chaton," she said. "I have to go."

"But Mari…"

Beep beep! "My parents are flying to Barcelona in a couple hours and they want to check some things with me."

He smirked. "You're going to be alone tomorrow?"

She laughed. "We're going out drinking with Nino and Alya, remember?"

"Yeah, but I'm supposed to stay over at Nino's tomorrow in case I get too drunk. I could stay with you instead."

Beep beep! "We'll see about that, mon minou." She chastely pecked his cheek once more before descending to the ground in time to transform into their civilian selves.

Marinette intertwined her hand with Adrien's as they started walking away. It hadn't been three minutes when her phone started to ring. It was Nino.

_"Yo, where are you?"_

"Hey…" She didn't mention his name, Adrien was already throwing him suspecting glances. "What's up?"

" _I'm outside your house with the kegs and everything else."_

She sighed exasperated. "I'm kinda busy right now, but fine."

" _Shit, you're with him? Ugh, fine."_

"I'll text you later."

She hanged up.

"It was Alya," she lied.

"That kinda sounded like Nino… not that I was eavesdropping or anything."

"She's got a cold. And uh… she asked me to grab some medicines for her if I could."

Adrien quirked an eyebrow. "I can walk you to her house. I don't have anything booked ton--."

"NO! I- I mean… it's okay, kitty." She kissed him. "I'll do it, it's just going to be quick. I have to be home soon anyway. You… you go and rest. Tomorrow is going to be a big day." She smiled.

The more time Adrien spent with Marinette, the easier it got to fish her out when she was scheming something. This was one of those times. But for now, he gave her the benefit of doubt.

"Go, I'll be fine," she insisted.

"O…kay? See you tomorrow, then."

She nodded vigorously, eager for the moment that he turned his back to her so that she could sprint away. Adrien had not seen Marinette this nervous since before they figured out they were secretly in love with each other's secret identity.

Marinette startled Nino when she knocked on the window of his car. He cried with a high pitch, not very appreciative of the surprise.

"Where were you dude?"

"With Adrien. He totally suspects something's up."

"Yeah, tell me about it. He's been drilling me for the past week. Anyway, it's just until tomorrow night. Help me unload the booze."

 "No! Not yet, my parents are still in the house. They don't know anything about this!"

"Marinette, do you know how hard it's going to be to lose Adrien tomorrow? He's going to notice."

She pondered, knowing he was right. "Okay fine, but you'll have to wait a couple hours. My parents are about to leave."

Marinette's parents were none the wiser when she finally arrived home. She explained she had spent the entire afternoon with Alya, looking for gifts for Adrien.

"I don't want you drinking too much tomorrow, young lady," her father warned, knowing very well of Adrien's birthday. It's all her daughter had been talking about for the past week. "You're old enough to make your choices, but please promise you'll stay out of trouble while we're gone."

"Of course Papa, you know I barely even drink." She could practically hear Tikki snorting from inside her purse. "Besides, Mr. Agreste doesn't let Adrien drink. We're just going to have a small get-together at his house."

"Okay, then."

Sabine just had come down with her petticoat and luggage. "Ready honey?"

Tom helped her with her bags and opened the door.

"There's about two deliveries the day after tomorrow Mari, they're already on the fridge," said Tom. "And I know you'll be busy but try and open the shop at least a couple hours to take orders."

Marinette nodded at everything, giddy with excitement. She'd be alone for four days!

"Have a good trip, guys," she said, hugging them tightly.

As soon as they left, Marinette rushed to the school's parking lot, where Nino was waiting. "Coast is clear."

He grinned. "Operation Get Adrien Agrekt has officially commenced."

"I'm calling Alya."

"Already did, she's on her way."

Marinette's house was small but once they carried the furniture and all breakable objects upstairs, it had enough space to harbor the kegs. Not to mention they managed to cover every inch of the kitchen aisle with all the bottles of spirits and liquors they bought. They set up a table for beer pong. Made room in the fridge. Stashed the bathroom with toilet paper. For the first time during the whole planning process, Marinette actually grew worried. "I just hope not a lot of people show up. If my parents find out I'll be grounded until I'm eighty two."

"Nah," Alya said. "I made it a private event. Only the people in our class know it's happening."

They sighed with content, excited for tomorrow and proud with the work they accomplished. "It's ready," Marinette said.

"I'm gonna be sore tomorrow from carrying those kegs," Nino complained.

Alya smirked. "But you'll forget as soon as you drink them up."

"True enough. Oh my god, I can't wait to see Adrien drunk, ha, ha. It's going to be epic!"

"I'm not going to let you give him those terrible shots you do," Marinette said.

He laughed. "No no no, the kid has to go through the ritual. We all did it. It's only fair."

"Poor Adrien."

Nino chuckled. "He'll probably lose consciousness after like, his third beer."


	2. Operation Get Adrien Agrekt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I think the title is very self-explainatory but in case y'all need more explanation: ADRIEN IS LOSING HIS ALCOHOL VIRGINITY.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let it be noted I struggled dearly to keep this decent enough to not make it a crack fic because I kept adding all these based-on-real-life scenes and I was like wow I have no class, do I? That or, no one is going to believe this. So, I cut real big chunks off.
> 
> Also, sorry for typos and misspelling. It annoys me too but I SWEAR I REREAD THIS THING LIKE THREE TIMES AND I AM BLIND.

Friday, October 13th finally arrived and getting ready for school went as uneventfully as any other day for Adrien. He didn't wait up to see his father arrive from the office, and no effort on Mr. Agreste's part had been done to congratulate his son before he went to school. He sighed, scrolling through the trivial notifications on his phone, disappointed that he didn't receive one message. Not one single message. Not even from Marinette.

 "Good morning, Adrien." Natalie joined him in the bleak dining room and handed him his schedule as well as a slim, carefully wrapped package, no doubt another pen from his father. "Your father wanted me to remind you he expects you to be on your best behavior tonight."

He rolled his eyes. No one knew better than him what it would mean if he were to step out of line at a bar. Paparazzi, the rage of his father, public exposure. Not to mention his father would probably lock him up in a tower, never to see the light of day again.

"Yes, Natalie."

"You have a photoshoot after school, all other activities were dismissed."

"Thank you."

"Are you ready to go?"

Adrien sighed, wiped his mouth and marched outside, pointedly remembering to grab the extra bag for his sleepover at Nino's and leaving the package his father sent untouched on the table. His presents had always been meager but the sight of the lonely thing lying on the sleek marble table was downright depressive.

His birthdays were a bit of a sore topic in the Agreste household. Except for Christmas and New Year, Mr. Agreste's absence was never as noticeable as on Adrien's birthday. But he tried to cheer himself up, at school things were always better. Especially on his birthday. Nino, Marinette, and Alya were always the first to wish him a happy birthday and they'd bring him gifts-- real gifts, not material things. Nino always made a DJ mix for him. Marinette gave him clothes and pastries she had made herself. Alya made blog entries of Ladybug's Number Two Fan (because she was obviously the first, excuse you.) Even the rest of his classmates congratulated him on that day, people at school who never talked to him, too. And then there was the fact that this would be his first birthday with a girlfriend-- with Ladybug! It only had been about a year since they found out about each other's identities, and only about eight months ever since Marinette and him started dating --for real, making out after patrols didn't count as dates for him.

His chest felt warmer only from the sight he caught of Nino. He was wearing a stupid grin on his face, and something else, although he couldn't quite pinpoint what it was… mischief?

"Heeeeeeyyyy." He swung an arm around his shoulders as they pounded their fists to greet each other. "Who's getting drunk as fuck today?"

Adrien laughed. "Not me."

"You, yes."

"I'll get in trouble, Nino. We talked about this."

"Psht. Nonsense. Today you my boy, become a man."

Adrien laughed even louder. "I think I hit puberty long ago."

"We'll see about that when you hold down your tequila, baby face."

Adrien rolled his eyes good-naturedly, nodding and thanking all the people that wished him a happy birthday. 

"There he is!"Alya cheered, joining the pair. "Oh, boy we're gonna get you so hammered tonight!"

"Not you too, Alya."

"Yes me too, Sunshine. If you want in in our drunk adventures club you have to go through our initiation."

"Why do I have a feeling this is going to be worse than being a freshman in an American frat?"

"Because it's going to be."Alya grinned.

He shrugged letting them dream all they wanted. Adrien valued his freedom quite a lot and getting black out drunk in public was one of the things that would get him under house arrest faster than he could say Cataclysm. He was not going to let that happen, and he knew Marinette wouldn't either.

Speaking of which, she was noticeably absent. He shifted uncomfortably at the thought, also making note of the fact his friends didn't give him their routine gifts. And it's not that he was materialistic, no. It's just that he had gotten used to that little bit of attention, and it was one of the things he usually looked forward on his birthday. He mentally wrinkled his nose at himself. God, was he really that selfish? He felt guilty. But also a bit sad. It was hard to describe.

"I'm going to my locker guys, be right back."

He stopped musing with his insecurities as he opened the locker. He let out a tiny gasp in surprise, suddenly feeling an exalting wave of affection. There was a single vanilla cupcake sitting on top of his books. The frosting was red, spotted with tiny chocolate Kisses. A custom-made candle stuck from the center, it appeared to have been woven with black and green threads of wax. At the bottom of the candle there was a tiny Chat Noir made of fondant resting against it, surprised at a ladybug poised on his hand.

Suddenly a pair of soft, small hands made the world go dark.

"Guess who," a melodic voice he knew all too well whispered in his ear. He smiled as she placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Happy birthday, chaton,"she whispered again.

He pried her hands off from his eyes and turned to hug her. "Thank you, Mari!"

In his excitement, he spun her around and caused her to giggle.

"You like it?"

"I love it! Look at the tiny Chat oh my god, it's so cute. I don't even want to eat it!"

"Well you should, I tried the dough yesterday and let's just say I could run my parents' bakery any day."

He slid an arm around her shoulders and pecked her cheek. "Thank you, princess."

"Ugh, gross. Get a room," Chloé interrupted them as they walked to class. "No one wants to see you two practically having sex everywhere, god."

"Good morning to you too, Chloé," Adrien said, his good mood unharmed.

"Whatever." She forced herself in between them to go through. "Out of the way, losers." Before leaving them alone she sneered at the cupcake on Adrien's hand. "You call that a pastry? A dog could do better."

"Have a good day, too, Chloé," Marinette said as she walked away. "She still not over us dating, huh?"

"Nope."

Nino, Alya, and Marinette were so. glad. when Adrien turned down Nino for ice-cream after school because of his photoshoot. They were in luck. He informed them, with much frustration to be noted, that the photoshoot was scheduled to end at seven p.m. Well that was one cat out of the way. They'd have more than enough time and cover to receive guests and get them ready to surprise Adrien. Their relief was a little too evident to go unnoticed by Adrien, unfortunately, but he decided not to make much of that. Actually there were a lot of things he decided not to make anything of today. Like the giddy smiles his classmates shared, whispering among themselves. Adrien found himself consulting Paris' entertainment calendar. Was there going to be a concert or something like that? Why was everyone so excited? Why did everyone turn him down when he invited them to go drinking tonight with the rest of his friends? He was the last to turn eighteen in the class, after all. It's not like they couldn't. Either way and for whatever cause, his self-assurance had definitely seen better days.

The photoshoot dragged by because of an uncooperative modeling partner. This photoshoot was for Gabriel's Winter Apparel, and for some ungodly reason, the PR in charge of the campaign thought it'd be a good idea to have Adrien model with two troublesome husky dogs. And though it was true he wasn't a real cat, god only knew he really didn't have patience for dogs. This small hell ended an hour after it was supposed to but as Nino promised, he waited for Adrien outside the photographer's studio until he was ready.

"Dayum, that's a sweet outfit, man," Nino said. Unlike 99% of the time, and to the misfortune of every other male in Paris, Adrien actually tried to look nice today. You don't turn eighteen every day, after all. He was wearing a pair of black jeans, ankle-high boots, an olive green shirt that brought out his eyes, and a black leather jacket.

"Thanks, I'll hook you up if you want."

They made a quick stop in a convenience store so that Adrien could officially "christen" his ID by buying a small bottle of vodka for pre-drinking with the girls at Marinette's house, although if he was perfectly honest the concept of drinking before going out to drink seemed moot to Adrien.

"It's cheaper that way," Nino explained as he let Adrien pick his weapon of choice.

Alya had been on guard duty for two hours now with the mission of spotting Nino's car as soon as it parked. The fact that they delayed so much got Marinette worried. Could it be that there had been an akuma? No, Alya would have heard. Not possible. Maybe the photoshoot extended, as it often happened.

_Relax Mari. Everything is going to be fine._

Alya gasped. "They're here, they're here!"

All the guests, some of them already tipsy, giggled and squealed and ran about to their places before Marinette turned off the lights. Hushed laughs and I need to pee's were forcibly suppressed as the footsteps of the boys became louder.

Adrien knocked on the door, causing some people to giggle excitedly and others to shush them.

"No one's answering," he said to Nino. His voice sounded muffled from inside the house.

"They're there, they're probably in Mari's room doing their make up or something."

He tried again. No luck. "Are you sure? Hang on, I'm texting her."

Marinette's phone buzzed and lit the living room with a faint blue light. Biting back her own excited laugh, she answered the text. "We're upstairs, come on in, the door's open."

Almost immediately, the doorknob clicked and it swooshed open. Adrien's heart dropped at the sight of darkness and his inner Chat Noir instinctively stepped in front of Nino.

"Something's not right," he muttered.

Marinette had to bite her shirt not to burst into laughter.

_No kitty, no claws out just yet._

"Er… why don't we try to find the lights first?"

Already well acquainted with the structure of Mari's house, Adrien effortlessly tapped onto the wall to find the switch. He clicked it and with it, Nino pressed play on the music and everybody else came out of their hiding spots.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY ADRIEN!" They shouted so loudly he almost dropped the bottle of vodka.

"What the--!"

Alya took a picture of him as everyone crowded around him to greet him, hug him, pat him on the back. She could safely argue she had never seen him so surprised, or excited, or moved. He found Mari, Nino, and Alya smirking smugly next to the booze table and simply grinned at them, blushing harder than he ever had.

Once the initial excitement of him arriving dissipated, everyone went back to their drinks, Nino cranked up the music even louder, and Adrien joined them first and foremost, by tackling them into a hug.

"You are the worst!" he exclaimed. "There I was thinking something was wrong with me and-- wait, how long have you guys been planning this, how even did you get all that booze? Marinette, your parents are going to kill you if they find out!"

They grinned. "Don't worry, we thought of _everything_ ," Alya said. "In short, Sunshine, you're getting Agrekt tonight."

Adrien laughed, highly appreciating the pun. "Thanks guys, this is the best birthday ever. Like, by far."

"Oh," Nino said, handing him a beer. "Don't thank us just yet."

They really did think of everything, Adrien noticed. For once, Alya and Marinette made the house "drunk proof." The fridge had more cupcakes like the one in his locker, also a tray of croissants, and jelly shots. There was more beer than there was people in the party, he was sure. And Marinette assured him that if things got out of hand a certain Ladybug would show up to shut down the party and simultaneously become the enemy of the teenagers of Paris.

"I can't believe you guys did all of this for me."

"Well, you're our bro," Nino said. "And we were feeling kind of shitty for keeping you out of the loop so bad about our drunk nights out so we decided to make a prank out of it."

"We're hoping you'll be the responsible drunk of us four. Because so far, no luck," Alya said.

Spoiler alert: He wasn't going to be.

One of the things he loved about being Chat Noir was that the mask and the suit helped him get rid of his inhibitions. As Chat Noir he was loud, silly, flirty. He was light and free like the wind that caressed his face as he vaulted across the rooftops of the city at night. He never expected to find that same liberating thrill somewhere else. He didn't find it in himself to care when swear words accidentally started dripping into his vocabulary like a broken faucet. Nor when his puns switched from innocent to outrageous innuendos. Or when him, Kim, and Nino engaged in a competition to see who could down five vodka shots faster.

Alya smirked as she recorded the entire thing. "Whoa, look at him go!"

Marinette snorted at Adrien's disgusted faces every time the alcohol touched his lips. It tasted horrible, but he downed them nonetheless. Never let it be said that Adrien Agreste backed down on a dare.

He won the competition, earning himself the honor of drinking an entire beer from a funnel and a dizzy head.

He stumbled back to Marinette and Alya with disoriented eyes and a stupid grin.

"Did y'see what I did there?"

"We sure did," Alya said, training the camera on him. "How are you feeling, Sunshine? Are you having fun?"

He slung his arm around Marinette for support. "Yeaaaaaah. It's great. I'm feelin' great Alya." A pause of consideration, then a scream. "THIS IS THE BEST PARTY EVER!"

Marinette flinched and laughed.

"Why aren't you drunk?" he asked blatantly, all of a sudden. He turned to Alya, too. "Why aren't _you_ drunk?"

"Because we wanna make sure you don't destroy my house," Marinette said.

"Pshhh. You know what. Nino's drunk. You should be drunk."

Marinette raised an eyebrow at him. Oh dear god, she hoped Alya had enough memory on her phone to record the entire night. "Are you peer pressuring your girlfriend into drinking, Adrien?"

"No… maybe. Hey! I'm not the one who like, tried to climb the Eiffel tower."

Marinette gasped. "I can't believe Nino told you about that! He broke the code!"

"Nuh uh, he just followed the bro code." Adrien stuck his tongue at her and then leaned closer to her, the accents of alcohol already slightly perceivable on his breath. "He told me about the time you danced on the pub, too."

"You're drunk, Adrien," Marinette said.

He laughed. "Yeah, but you danced on a table for beer."

"I'm going to kill Nino."

"Speaking of which," Alya said, pressing pause on her recording and putting away her phone. "He's won the last three matches of beer pong and that's an injustice I'm not willing to bear. Excuse me."

Adrien quirked an eyebrow. "What?"

Marinette pointed at the table where a loud, grinning Nino was putting Nathaniël to shame. "No one beats Alya at beer pong." 

His judgement clarified for an instant, curiosity bubbling inside him. Mischievously, he said, "No one?"

"No one, chaton. Don't even try."

"Oh but you forget, princess. Among my many talents, I play basketball." 

They approached to the table to witness the showdown. Nino rolled the ball over to Alya and winked at her.

"Ladies first."

Without an effort, Alya doused the ping pong ball on water and promptly shot, squarely acing the first cup. The bystanders broke in a cheer. A cheer that got louder after she scored two, three, four times more.

"SUCK IT, LAHIFFE. SUCK. IT!" Alya shouted as Nino was forced to drink cup after cup. She high-fived Marinette. "That's my girl!"

Adrien immediately marched to Nino's side, adrenaline and testosterone spiking in his bloodstream. He pretended to massage Nino's shoulders. "You got this man, you got this. Don't let me down."

Shoot and…

"You missed," Adrien said.

Marinette and Alya laughed and taunted loudly. Alcoholized and already loosening her sense of decency, Alya said, "That's what she said!"

Marinette snorted.

Adrien, also drunk and probably even more uninhibited than her, glared at her and puffed his chest out. "Wait until I'm done with you, Césaire!"

"BRING IT."

Long story short, Nino more or less had his butt handed down to him by Alya in the most humiliating way possible.

Pumped up and more than ready to defend his best friend's honor, he hastily rearranged the cups and mindlessly filled them up with beer, causing the amber liquid to spill.

"Don't worry, bro. She's going down!"

Marinette laughed. Chat Noir usually was competitive. Adrien, not so much. It was nice to see him show that part of him. Odd, but nice.

"Alya. Wipe that cocky little smirk off his face," she taunted.

Adrien stood strong in his smugness. "You and I both know I'm gonna win, bug."

"My girl here is going to wreck you, Agreste. I'd put money on it."

"Is that a bet, miss Dupain-Cheng?"

"You bet your butt it is."

"Fine. What are we betting?"

"Loser grants the other _whatever_ they want."

Adrien gave her his signature Chat Noir shit-eating grin. "Okay. But you have to play too, then. Nino'll play with me, right man?" He nodded at him and Nino immediately stood by his side.

"Hell yeah."

Marinette glared confidently at him. "Prepare to lose."

He winked at her. Since he was the one challenging Alya he got to shoot first. He fixed his eyes on one of the center cups with his tongue slightly poking out of the corner of his mouth. He shook his shoulders like a cat about to pounce and shot. It landed neatly on the cup he aimed at and looked at Marinette with such a smug smile it edged on arrogant, praised by Nino and the match spectators. "I can't wait, princess."

"Finish him, Alya. Finish him," she encouraged.

Score on the girls' side. Then on the boys'. Then on the girls'. Then the girls missed twice. They recovered but Adrien and Nino had an advantage. The game remitted to a single cup on each side and neither being even close to scoring. They extended for so long Max meddled in and decided to sentence them to a death match. If one of the teams managed to score on one last shot, the other would have to take the equivalent of 10 shots of tequila. If neither did, they'd have to drink five each.

Adrien got the last shot even though he was already feeling like the table itself moved. The ball bounced off the rim of the cup in one of those odd shots where it was supposed to go in but by sheer bad luck, it didn't.

"Mari, girl. You got this one."

"Nooo," she said giggling, unfortunately tipsy. "I'll fail. I'm a klutz. You're butter. I mean better."

"Come on! You got this! I threw the last shot. And I'm drunk so."

Marinette reluctantly grabbed the ball and made an effort to aim at the cup, already feeling it fall way off the target. She decided the best course of action was to mentally prepare for the burning sensation of the tequila going down her throat when suddenly… score! The ball went right in and everyone cheered. Everyone except Adrien and Nino, who were groaning and whining at their defeat.

"OH MY GOD DID YOU SEE ALYA? DAMN I WAS SMOOTH."

"I SAW GIRL, I SAW!"

They turned to the boys. "IN YOUR FACE!"

"That was just luck!" Adrien said. "It was luck!"

Max presented them with the ten shots as promised. They endured the torture even though the girls offered to help with a couple.

"No no," Adrien said, slurring his words more and more as he took his share of tequila. "PAPA AGRESTE IS A HORRIBLE DAD BUT HE DIDN'T RAISE A QUITTER."

Marinette couldn't help but laugh out loud.

"I think Sunshine's gonna go nite nite any time now," Alya said.

"Nah, he's okay," Marinette said. He's been way more disoriented than that, she knew.

After their beer pong match Marinette took Adrien to where everyone was dancing in order to allow Adrien to sweat a bit of the alcohol off, which he did gladly. Dancing with Marinette was one of his favorite things to do with her ever since they started dating. Unfortunately he didn't get to do as often as he like but now that he was eighteen he was giddy to finally take her to a dance club. Dancing was the best and safest way to channel their alter egos without risking being discovered.

Unlike everyone else in there, their dancing game was _solid_ , as Nino described once. A lot of it had to do with the excellent shape that was produced by akuma-fighting and night-patrolling, but also it was the sheer chemistry between them. It was so passionate and in sync, Marinette could swear she could feel sparks fly between them. Not to mention one of her favorite things was that this was the perfect excuse to be sexy around her boyfriend, to tease him. She knew how much he loved it, given that most of this chasing game usually occurred when she was Ladybug. As Chat he enjoyed to chase after Ladybug after a specially frustrating tease, but when Marinette did it, oh boy, he was barely ever ready. It sent him overboard every time.

Marinette did this thing where she got painfully close to him, pressing her body against his and practically touching his lips. Practically. Once his eyelids slowly descended, preparing to kiss her, she'd pull away with a devilish giggle. The boy's usual reaction would be a frustrated groan followed by a pair of big, sparkly kitten eyes pleading at her. "My lady! Don't be mean!"

Innocent, cute, sober Chat would do that.

Drunk Chat however…

He locked his hands with her waist and pulled her close before she could escape. Her eyes grew wide and excited as he pushed against her and dance. Marinette felt his lips fluttering around her ear, her neck, her own lips. She could taste the smug smirk in his expression. He leaned in again and saw with satisfaction that Ladybug had her head slightly tilted up, waiting for him to kiss her again. His lips barely brushed against hers when he spoke.

"I think I'm going to grab one of those cupcakes." He left her wearing an outraged expression, shaped by disbelief. "You do the chasing tonight, princess." He winked.

Knowing no one would be listening because of the loud music, she said exasperatedly although excited, "That damned cat."

No matter if they were on opposite sides of the house, Adrien's eyes always found Marinette's. Ladybug's always found Chat's. And if either could describe what they saw in them they'd use one word and one word only: Sin. Lustful, selfish, and greedy. Adrien's glance reminded Marinette that if they didn't go to hell for undressing each other with their eyes in front of everyone, they would because of the many times they had made out on top of Notre Dame.

The memory made her blush.

Adrien and Marinette met again after each going their way for an hour or two. They

joined Juleka, Mylène, Ivan, and Nathaniël, who were playing "Most Likely." Each stated something and everyone had to point at the person who they thought was most likely to have ever done that. They had to take as many gulps of their drink as they had been pointed at.

Adrien chuckled evilly, delighting in the possibilities.

"Behave…" Marinette whispered in his ear.

"I don't know what's that _chat_ about, m'lady."

She rolled her eyes.

Nathaniël was first. "Most likely to get akumatized this year."

Almost everyone pointed at Marinette, including Adrien, who was grinning complicitly.

"And wouldn't you like that," she said, taking four gulps of her Cuba Libre.

"Most likely to fail Monday's Physics test," Mylène said. Fingers pointed at Ivan and Nathaniël.

"Most likely to make out with Chat Noir, if they had the chance," Adrien said, ignoring Marinette's outraged face. Fingers pointed at Juleka, Nathaniël, and Marinette.

"You'd be okay with me cheating on you with Chat Noir?" Marinette teased Adrien, seeing that he (obviously) pointed at her.

He shrugged coolly. "Hell, _I_ 'd make out with him if I had the chance. He's like, super handsome."

Marinette laughed. "You're the worst."

"Most likely to have a threesome," Ivan said.

Fingers pointed at both Marinette and Adrien. Well, that was awkward.

"Most likely to have a fetish for Ladybug and Chat Noir," said Marinette, managing to bring out a slight pink tone on Adrien's already rosy cheeks, when fingers pointed at him and Mylène.

"Most likely to have sex tonight," Juleka said to finish the round. Fingers pointed to, yes, no one else than Adrien Agreste. Marinette blushed like a tomato along him.

Luckily enough, everyone was too buzzed to even remember that he was one of the ones who lowered his finger when they were playing Never Have I Ever and someone said "Never have I ever had sex before."

Because yes, contrary to what everyone in their school thought, Marinette and Adrien had _not_ taken that step yet. Yeah their flirting had been getting increasingly indecent lately, but that was just banter. They weren't ready yet. He was sober enough to remember that, and be glad that they thought so. That was nothing anyone should be minding themselves with.

The night evolved and for Adrien's sake, Nino, Alya, and Marinette decided to stay sober enough to remember their names. So far and judging by how Adrien stumbled as he walked, they succeeded in giving him the alcohol christening of his life. Really, they didn't have to do anything. The boy did it all himself. He was the embodiment of curiosity, he wanted to try everything there was. I've Never Never? Yep. Sociables? Why, of course. Every drink, every dare, the word "no" disappeared from Adrien's vocabulary past twelve a.m. Drinking upside down? Who do you take him for? _Obviously_. Jagger shot after a tequila one? Psht, please.

"Get Agreste Agrekt is officially a success, girls," Nino said proudly as he snatched Adrien's drink from his hand.

"Hey what the f--."

"Trust me, you'll thank me tomorrow."

Adrien moaned. "Everything is spinning."

Marinette placed a kiss on his temple and cooed him. "We should take him upstairs."

He stopped her. "No. I'm-- I'm… Bathroom. Now."

Nino rushed him to the bathroom in the second floor but easily came down after twenty minutes.

His clothes were soaked and he had an irritated expression on his face, the alcoholic glee was beginning to leave him. He felt it in his limbs.

"Where's Adrien?" Marinette asked.

"Your room. I had to soak him to sober him after he puked everything. He's okay though. Gonna have a monumental hangover tomorrow. He kept complaining your room was spinning."

"I better go check on him, I'll be right back."

"Uh… I think we have bigger problems right now," Alya pointed at the door.

It was a vision, a nightmare. This couldn't be happening.

Sabrina, Lila, and Chloé just entered the room with a trail of teenagers Marinette had never seen in her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I am obliged to clarify this to anyone who has never drank before: ADRIEN'S ALCOHOL TOLERANCE IS A GLORIFIED LIE. NO ONE IS A HEAVYWEIGHT ON THEIR FIRST TIME DRINKING. NO ONE. THREE DRINKS AND YOU'LL BE ON THE FLOOR. He should have like, died after the beer pong, but with the magic of writing everything is possible. 
> 
> Also, if it's your first time drinking do yourself a favor and DO NOT be like Adrien, who didn't eat anything before drinking or who mixed up spirits and beer. He'll be hating himself the morning after his birthday for the terrible hangover, believe you me. 
> 
> Also, shoutout to the foreign exchange students who are party beasts like I was in the good old days! (we're the life of the party, shuddup Marinette) 
> 
> Oh, and con-crit is really welcomed guys! I'm always looking forward to improve my writing technique-wise! :D


	3. We Never Speak About The Drink Club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party gets a little too wild and Marinette has to deal with a drunken Chat Noir and the aftermath of Adrien's party.

"Alya!" Marinette scolded her friend. "What the heck!"  

"What was I supposed to do? Not tell them? Everybody in school knew. 'Sides I told them like, right before the bell rang today. I didn't expect they'd come."  

"Well, they brought in the whole cavalry," Nino said. Some of the newest additions to the crowd were insultingly drunk. They practically inhaled every single piece of food they found once they discovered the fridge. Dear god, some of them were college students. And not just any type of university students,  _foreign exchange students_. If movies held any truth, Marinette's tiny house wouldn't be able to survive their partying.  

She shook her head, trying to clear her judgement. "I'm going to talk to Chloe."  

The blond, spoiled thing was flirting with one of the said students when Marinette interrupted her. "Chloe, hey, I need to talk to you." 

"Marinette!" Chloe's tongue slurred as she spoke. If Marinette wasn't sober by now, that hug surely did the job. "I'm so happy to see youuuuu…" 

"Heh, yeah. Well. Chloe. These people you brought, they need to go." 

"I made friends at the club. They wanted to come." 

"Yeah but my house is too small for all of the-- HEY PUT THAT DOWN! THAT'S A CHINESE RELIC I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW!" 

"Chloe, this is--." 

"Hey, it's super cool that you let us in," the college kid interrupted. He was one of those bratty guys that trusted too much in their looks for their own good. "This party is awesome. I heard it's for Adrien Agreste, is he around?"  

Marinette glared at Chloe. That dumb, dumb girl. "No. You heard wrong but--."  

"Marinette!" Alya suddenly appeared next to her. The worry in her face made Marinette's stomach drop.  

"What is it?" 

"There's more people outside." 

"What?" She hurried to the window.  

Drunk. Drunker than she had ever been. And they weren't two or three, no. More like one or two dozen. They were playing and shoving each other and then… crash! A big brute managed to stumble upon the sidewalk and fell against the bakery's window. 

"Shit!"  

"They keep getting on the second floor, too," Alya said. "Nino's trying to hold them off."  

Marinette kneaded her face in utter fear. "We need to shut it down." 

"Are you kidding? There's like a hundred people in here." 

"Yeah but we don't know anyone, everyone already left."  

"And what are you planning to do? Freakin' Chloe brought an entire club in here."  

Marinette bit her lip and reached for her earrings. "Wait here, I'll be right back." 

"Where are you--? Marinette!"  

She pushed her way to the stairs and then to the attic, where Adrien was still moaning, although looking a bit better. 

"They're wrecking this house of yours, and Adrien literally just cried because he thought you three abandoned him," Plagg said, amused, as he flew in to greet her with Tikki following closely. 

"I told you this was a bad idea Marinette! They're destroying the bakery!"  

"Yeah, don't need to tell me twice."  

"Princess?" Adrien mumbled. 

"Shh. You stay in bed. Tikki, spots on!" She opened the trap door to the terrace and jumped into action, giving the bakery-destroying hooligans a run for their money. She ran upstairs, causing an exhilarated uproar. Even Alya forgot about keeping the unwanted strangers at bay and recorded Ladybug's apparition. 

"Hell yeah Ladybug! This party just got way cooler!" One of the university students said.  

She smirked. "Don't get ahead of yourself." She snatched the electricity cords from the computer and the speakers and left the apartment in a puffy deafness, result of listening to loud electronic music for hours.  

"This party is over!" She roared. "Come on, come on, don't make me call Chat Noir!"  

The strangers simply stood there for a second, waiting for her to do something.  

She growled. "Off you go before I call the police! Neighbors have been complaining, come on!"  

"You heard her pals!" Alya cut in. "This  _is_  Ladybug. The last thing you want to do is make her--." 

One of the kids that already had gotten out rushed in again and shouted, "Yo, someone got akumatized outside!"  

Marinette sighed. Just her freaking luck.  _Of course_  some random drunken kid would get upset over Ladybug shutting down a party.  

He called himself The Boozer and he had the power to shoot "shots" that immediately got people drunk out of a wine-bottle shaped gun.  

"Just my luck," Ladybug said with a resigned sigh as she jumped down back into the street.  

Worse than having to fight off an intoxicated akuma victim, however, was to fight off an intoxicated akuma victim with an equally intoxicated Chat Noir, who for some reason thought it was a good idea to wear her room's lampshade as a hat to combine it with her favorite skirt. In that moment, she found herself wondering if that whole Friday 13th bad luck superstition held any truth, even though it technically was already Saturday. Judging by the fact that Alya was recording every single thing, she decided this bad luck streak was here to stay.  

"Fuck my life." She sighed.  

"Leave m'lady alone!" Chat menaced the Boozer with a slur of mispronounced words as he struggled to stay upright atop Mari's terrace. "I got you m'lad--" he hiccuped. "Lady." 

"My knight in shining armor," she muttered. "Chat! Get down from there!"  

"Oh, I am DOWN," he said. "WITH THIS PARTY!"  

Everyone on the street cheered.  

Just in time, Mari swung her yoyo, sending her in a spiral towards Chat just in time to push him out of the Boozer's way as he shot at him.  

"Prrincess…"  

She hissed. "Adrien, stay! You're going to get yourself hur--" 

"Watch out!" Adrien pulled her out of the way in time to receive a blow from the Boozer instead of her. What little sobriety he had gained from the exercise and fresh air was immediately lost to the villan's superpower. Chat Noir rolled on the floor in agony. "Everythin's spinnin'. Why. WHY. Sweet lord, why?"  

Laybug growled. "That's it. Lucky Charm!" After exclaiming the words, a red-and-black polkadotted bottle of water fell on her hands. What the heck was she supposed to do this? She glanced at the railing of the terrace, her writhing boyfriend, and the Boozer, who menacingly approached her. "It's over, give me your Miraculous!"  

"Not so fast. Chat, your Cataclysm!" 

He groaned. "Catclsm…" Whatever he said, it was good enough for Plagg, because as soon as he touched the railing it fell. Ladybug splashed the Boozer's face with the water, made him stumble back and drop the wine gun. Ladybug swiftly caught it midair and smashed it against the ground, releasing the akuma and immediately de-evilizing it. One "Miraculous Ladybug!" later, the Boozer-- whose name was actually Paul, found himself wondering what he was doing in front of Ladybug and Chat Noir, on some stranger's terrace.  

"What's going on?" Chat Noir groaned, still drunk. Unfortunately her cleansing magic only took responsibility of akuma-related damage, meaning Chat still had a terrible recovery to go over.  

His Miraculous beeped, warning of his upcoming transformation.  

"Whoops, that's our cue," Ladybug said, gently stripping Chat of the lamp shade and the skirt. "I trust you can find your way down? The emergency stairs are over there."  

"You… you two were at the party? Like, as people?" He exclaimed. Uncomfortable with the kid's conclusions, Ladybug simply smiled.  

"Don't drink and drive."  

She grabbled Chat by the waist and swung away from her house so that he could transform without leaving suspicion. The last she heard of Paul the Drunk College Kid, was, "Holy shit, I was in the same party as Ladybug and Chat Noir!"  

Hidden in the type of dark, smelly alley where murders likely happened, Chat detrasnformed back into Adrien with a disturbing lack of his usual class. He bent over a trash can just in time to puke what little contents his stomach had, hissing at a cat that threatened to pounce at him. "Try me, punk. Just try me."  

He could have kept arguing but a new wave of nausea hit him. Marinette rubbed his back in circles "This is awful," he said, finally sounding a bit more sober. "Why would you do this for fun?" 

"We never get as drunk as you did." She slung one of his arms around her shoulders so she could help him walk back to the house. "You were so into it," she giggled. 

"I just remember I was on your bed then all of a sudden I was outside."   
"You were wearing my lamp shade and my polka dotted skirt." She snorted. "I hope Alya took a picture of that."  

He moaned. "Great." 

"You don't remember anything else?" 

"I remember I beat Nino at Never Have I Ever. And that I probably had enough jelly shots for a lifetime. Ack, my head hurts…"  

She patted him goodnaturedly. "Okay, Mister Party Hard, let's get you to bed. Enough adventures for one night."  

The hustle of the akuma made wonders to dissipate the crowd of the party, including Lila, Sabrina, and Chloe. When Mari came back with Adrien, Nino and Alya were sitting at the foot of the stairs, drinking their last beer.  

"Where were you?" Alya demanded. "You totally missed Ladybug! She was in your house!" She promptly produced her phone to show Adrien and Mari the attack.  

"Sorry. Someone, I'm not saying who, ran off when people went outside to see the akuma." 

Adrien made a face at the video. "What the heck is Chat Noir's problem?"  

"He was just as drunk as you, Sunshine," Alya said. "I can't believe Chat Noir and Ladybug were at your party, though! They were here, Mari! That's so cool. You're so lucky they came, Adrien." 

He sneaked a glance a Mari. "Yep. Super lucky." He looked around the room, noticing how trashed it was. Bottles everywhere, food smeared on the floor, broken glass… "Geez, they left a mess. Too bad the Lucky Charm couldn't clean this too." 

"We'll clean up tomorrow," Mari said. "For now let's just go to bed."  

They barely had enough energy to brush their teeth and change into comfortable clothes, but alas, they made it to their respective spots. Nino and Alya slept on the chaise against their own will. They argued Adrien should sleep there in case he felt sick but he was stubborn about it. He could count with his hand the times he had slept over with Marinette without having to worry about being busted by her parents. Drunk or not, he wasn't going to miss this chance. Besides, there was only so much he could puke. His stomach was empty.  

Thanks to the alcohol, Alya and Nino dozed right off so Mari and Adrien didn't have to worry about privacy.  

"I'm honestly scared about the hangover tomorrow," he whispered. 

Mari giggled. "You'll be fine. I'll make you some remedies." 

He sighed. Marinette felt as he scooped a little closer to her and tentatively wrapped an arm around her. "Okay."  

He smiled at the sensation of Marinette reciprocating his affection with some of her own. She pressed against him and snuggled against his chest.  

"Thank you so much for the party, Mari," he said. "No one had ever done something so nice for me." 

She kissed his jaw. "You deserve much more, chaton," said Mari, and giggled lightly as she felt his arms tighten around her.  

"You're going to be the death of me, Marinette." He kissed her cheek.  

"I'm glad you had fun. You were behaving so much like Chat, though."  

"That's because I  _am_  Chat, m'lady." 

She felt her stomach jolt with excitement. Of course he was Chat, she knew. But it always made her giddy to remember. "But the rest of the world doesn't know that, silly cat." She laughed breathily. "Everyone was so amused." 

"Were they now?" 

"I mean, you can't deny watching Adrien Agreste kick back and be totally over the top wouldn't be a sight to behold if you were out of the loop. I mean, you started stealing people's drinks at one point. And punning. Dear god, it was bad."  

He chuckled.  

"And… you kept bragging about me being your girlfriend." 

"Yeah, I remember that," he admitted smugly and stole a kiss from her. "I told Kim and Max." 

"I was worried you'd start saying I was Ladybug or something."  

"Of course not, princess. It takes more than alcohol to make me fess up… which is not the case with you, or so Nino says," he teased. 

"To be fair, tequila and I don't mix well." 

"Yes, I'm not sure ladybugs can stand tequila."  

They both laughed quietly. 

"I'm really happy you enjoyed yourself, though," Marinette said. "We wanted to make it special." 

"Thank you, bug." He kissed the top of her head. "I mean, really. I was so excited about going out to drink with you guys, but when I saw everyone came here, I almost fainted. I couldn't believe it." 

"Well, everyone was very excited. They had known for weeks." 

"Really?"  

Marinette nodded.  

"Wow. I thought no one remembered. How much time did you spend planning all of this?" 

"A few months," Marinette confessed. "Ever since I figured my parents wouldn't be here for your birthday." 

"You three. I swear." 

She kissed him slowly, hoping his side of the conversation would start to die down and focus on her lips.  

"You really didn't have to go through all this trouble." 

"Hmm… of course I had to. You're my minou." She ghosted her lips on his and gently nibbled at will. "And you know the bug loves her minou very much."  

He smiled into the kiss. "And you say I'm the cheesy one."  

Adrien woke up with the light that filtered through Marinette's window. He squinted at it and emitted the equivalent of a feline hiss as he slowly readjusted his eyes. Like Nino and Alya promised, his head pounded and felt like someone was trying to pop it the way you pop a grape. He groaned. 

"Hmm…" the girl next to him moaned, regaining consciousness as well. "'Mornin…" 

"Kill me, bug. Kill me right now."  

"That bad, huh?" 

"My head hurts. My back hurts. My eyes hurt. Everything hurts."  

Marinette nodded. "I feel ya." She plopped down on the bed again and buried her head under the pillows. She was forced to reemerge when her phone buzzed with a notification. Reluctantly, she poked her head out of her shelter and realized she not only had one message, but thirty eight messages in total from her mother. She could feel a scream get stuck on her throat.  

"Marinette, why aren't you answering our messages? Call me as soon as you see this." 

She jumped off from the bed. "Shit!"  

"What's going on?" Adrien asked alarmed, watching how she fumbled to dial on the touch screen. She put a finger to her lips before her mom answered. 

"Hey mom!"  

_"Marinette!"_ She sounded relieved, yet a bit irritated.  _"Why weren't you answering your phone? You know the rules when you go out. Your father and I were very worried, we thought something happened to you!"_  

"Sorry mom." She sighed as she rubbed her eyes. "I completely forgot." 

_"What have we told you about drinking responsibly? We are going to have a conversation when we get home, young lady."_  

Adrien looked worried at Marinette catching a bit of the conversation himself. Mrs. Cheng sounded really angry. And yes, they only had been officially dating for some months but usually when Marinette screwed up, Adrien did too, and if there was something the Dupain-Chengs weren't afraid of doing that was scolding Adrien like he was their son, too. By all means he appreciated it, it's not the same to be scolded out of love than out of power. But that didn't mean he wasn't healthily scared of the lecture that was sure to come.  

"Okay, mom…" 

"So please call Nadja, she offered to pick us up at the airport today. And don't forget about the deliveries. The clients are picking up their orders around four." 

"Er… what?"  

"We're flying today, Marinette." 

"Weren't you flying until tomorrow?" 

"No." Silence. "Is there a problem?" 

Adrien saw color leave his girlfriend's face. "What?" he mouthed. 

"Marinette?"  

"Yeah, yeah, totally… Uh, okay, I'll call Mrs. Chamack. No problem." 

Silence. 

"Good. See you in a couple hours, honey." Mrs. Cheng hung up and with that Marinette became a big ball of wrecked nerves and wailing. She paced around the room biting her nails. 

"No no no no… I'm so dead. I'm so very dead. Alya, Nino!"  

"What happened, bugaboo?" He said before the other pair was awake and got up. The world spun as he did.  

"They're flying back TODAY. And the house's a mess and--and--." 

"And those kids from last night ate the cakes in the storage fridge," said Plagg. "I was going to tell you when you got to bed but you two seemed… busy."  

"What?" she cried in the highest pitch she could conjure. "ALYA!" she moaned again. 

The brunette stirred lazily and confused amid her friend's nervous breakdown.  

"What?" she mumbled. 

"My parents are flying back today!"  

"Shit, really?"  

She nodded vigorously and looked around herself, taking in the utter mess that was Marinette's room. "How long?" 

"What?" 

"How long until they come back?" 

"They fly at five. But I have to make a stupid wedding cake from scratch and like, a hundred cupcakes. Oh no…" 

"Relax, girl, relax." Alya began pacing herself, although much more collected. "Okay. Nino. NINO. Wake up." 

"Hmm…" the boy growled and pulled the covers up to his head. "Too hungover…" 

Unappreciative of his response, Adrien threw a pillow that landed squarely on his face. "Get up Nino, we're in trouble." 

Nino glared at the blond.  

"Okay, so… it's ten a.m.," Alya said. "This is how things are gonna roll. Mari, you go down to the bakery and get onto those cakes. Adrien, you and Nino go down to the second floor and clean it up. I'll take the first floor. Got it?"  

They nodded. "Then get moving!"  

"What about breakfast?" Nino asked, only to meet Alya's menacing growl.  

"Okay, no breakfast until we're done, got it." 

She wasn't sure how they made it, but they did. Orders had been delivered with only a minimal delay, the house look cleaner than her parents had left it, and most importantly, hangovers were correctly and successfully nursed. At exactly 7 p.m., when Marinette's parents opened the door, Nino had just finished repositioning the last of the family's portraits on the wall and hurried to join the other three in a fake match of UNO.  

"Hey there!" Marinette greeted her parents with a hug, acting surprised.  

"Hi honey," Sabine said, warmly and quickly turning to her friends. First Nino and Alya, and then Adrien. "Oh, come here! Happy birthday, Adrien!" She took a moment to look at him and was hit by a sudden pang of both melancholy and happiness. "Look at you all grown up." 

Adrien beamed at her. "It's still me, Mrs. Dupain Cheng" 

"Yes, but oh, I can't help it. I still remember when you were this tall," she elevated her hand to a certain height.  

"We brought you pastries, too," Tom said, producing a small paper bag. "Granted, they're not as good as ours but we know you love these." 

"Thanks Mr. Dupain Cheng!"  

"And how was the trip to Barcelona?" Marinette asked. 

"Good," said Sabine. "Aunt Amelia is doing good. What about you four, how was yesterday?" 

Adrien and Marinette looked at each other, knowing they had walked into dangerous territory.  

"Uh... It was good, pretty calm," started Adrien. "We were at my house." 

"Just the four of us," piped Alya.  

"Really?" Tom said. "That's quiet, for an eighteenth birthday." 

"It was alright," Adrien said. "We played board games and watched movies." 

"You should go out to drink soon, to celebrate," Sabine suggested. 

Adrien and Marinette glanced at each other again.  

"And maybe next time," said Tom. 

"You don't have to ask Ladybug and Chat Noir to come shut down the party at our house," Sabine finished the sentence.  

All four of them burned with shame. Sabine produced her phone and showed them a video of Ladybug and drunken Chat Noir doing what they could to hold off the army of derailed teenagers. 

"Is there anything you want to tell us?"  

Marinette gulped.  

"I--." 

"It was my fault, Mrs. and Mr. Dupain-Cheng. Mari told me you would not be home for my birthday and I asked her if she could--." 

Classic Chat Noir, always putting himself between Marinette and the bullet.  

"That's not true," Marinette interrupted. "I told Alya and Nino that I wanted to throw Adrien a surprise party for his birthday, and since you weren't going to be in the house..." 

Adrien glanced at her, subtly annoyed with her. 

"If it hadn't been for Ladybug they would have wrecked the bakery, Marinette," her dad scolded her.  

"I know... I'm sorry." 

"This is our livelihood, are you aware of that?" 

"Yes," she said, feeling small. 

"So you understand what you did was very, very irresponsible?" 

"Yes." 

"So, it goes beyond saying that you will be grounded for the next weeks," said Sabine. 

"...Yes." 

"No going out on Fridays," she said, eyeing the other three, but especially Adrien. "And Saturdays and Sundays you will stay in the bakery to help. For two weeks."  

"But maman!" One glance and Marinette stopped dead on her tracks. Ladybug and all, she had learned over time that sometimes her mom had to have the last word. "—yes..." 

"As for you three," Sabine said. "Did your parents know you would be here?"  

The other three teens shook their heads.  

She sighed. "Let it be the last time any of you four do this without consent of adults. In any of your houses, understood?"  

They nodded.  

Sabine briefly looked the video with which Tom and her realized her little apartment had been saved from obliteration by Ladybug and an extremely intoxicated Chat Noir. "And if I catch you drinking like this again, with all the pain of my heart, I will have to tell your parents. Including you, Adrien." 

Adrien's eyes widened. "Yes, ma'am."  

"Wha-what do you mean drinking like this?" Marinette asked, noticing none of the four were in the video, except Ladybug and Chat Noir. 

"Well, look at this! I don't know whom Chat Noir is, but I assume he must have been in the party. And if he got this out of control being a super hero, I can only imagine how reckless you four were."  

"He was shot by the akuma," Marinette lied. "The akuma fired shots..."  

Sabine quirked an eyebrow at her, all too familiar with her daughter's ability to improvise excuses on the spot. 

Marinette shrugged. "I couldn't make it up if I tried, I swear."  

Adrien turned pale. "Either way, it won't happen again, Mrs. Dupain-Cheng. I promise."  

"I hope not."  

Marinette's friends and Adrien stayed over for dinner after Sabine insisted that she was more disappointed than angry and that after all, you could always learn from your mistakes. They all helped around in preparation and cleaning, and then some more. Nino even took out the trash. After they dismissed themselves, Marinette's parents gave her permission to walk with the others to their homes, on Alya's request. But Alya didn't walk them into her house, she stopped at the park near the collège they used to attend to.  

"Alya, we're going to get Mari in trouble," Adrien said.  

She smirked devilishly at them. "I wanted to show you something."  

It seemed like Nino was in on the joke because he also grinned like he had suddenly gone out of his mind. Marinette and Adrien looked at each other, worry clear on their faces.  

Oh no. Last night's memories were fuzzy at best, for both of them. Marinette remembered there had been an Akuma and that Adrien ended more or less as a shit-faced bulk. Did... did Alya and Nino find out? 

"So... I think last night we all got way more hammered than we thought we would be," she said. 

"And it should never be repeated again," Adrien said. "It's eight p.m. and my head still hurts." 

"It should never be repeated again, indeed," Alya lied. "But before we all forget this shameful episode in Daddy's Perfect Boy's life... I got pictures."  

"No--" 

"YES!" Marinette exclaimed, unable to hide her amusement.  

Oh, Sunshine, these are some headshots you're gonna want to show your agent." Alya winked. "They're A plus."  

Marinette cackled, not imagining Adrien but Chat instead. 

"Once," Adrien said. "Once and you delete them in front of me. My father will murder me with his own two hands if he ever finds out. What happened last night never happened at all and I will deny it if ANY of you ever bring it up." He glared at Mari and she grinned. 

"Fair enough," Alya said. 

"Don't worry bro," said Nino. "You're part of the club now, and we never speak about the club. It's like a secret identity almost. You know like Ladybug and Chat Noir." 

"That is a gross, gross overstatement, but okay," said Adrien. "Let's see the dang pictures." He got ready to feel the embarrassment of his life. 

Alya opened her Photos app and... 

"OH SHIT!"  

That day was the first time Adrien ever swore in front of someone, and the day he learned he actually was not so photogenic after all...

 

 

The End. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So after one year, this baby is DED! Wuhoo! Hope you enjoyed and thanks for reading. I know I barely replied at all, but I want to say thanks to all of you guys who kept leaving all those nice, encouraging comments. You're the reason why I keep writing these ML stories ^^. 
> 
> Also, if you're wondering about the OT4's pictures, remember the Hangover? Take Vegas, the sex, the nudity, and drugs out of the pic and I'll leave the rest to your imagination 8) And yes, Adrien became the Dad Friend who drives everyone home because when he drinks he is worse than all of the other three combined.

**Author's Note:**

> The first rule of Drink Club is we never talk about Drink Club, sorry Adrien. 
> 
> Mari, Nino, and Alya's hashtag in this thing is officially #Get Agreste Agrekt 2k16 
> 
> In my head, Adrien is a Libra and therefore an October child. And he was born on a Friday 13, fAlso black cats= associated with dark magic + October=Halloween + Friday 13= bad luck = Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir, everyone. 
> 
> Also, I spiritually relate to drunk!Marinette because I too have tried to climb the Eiffel tower. While being in the American continent. #drunk logic.


End file.
